disrupted dreams

The desire to fall asleep is completely gone. Sleep used to be refreshing, it used to give energy and a fresh perspective. Now it never comes and when it does I wish it hadn't. The dreams are full of angry clouds, pain, sadness, destruction, loved ones hurting, and I am helpless in all of it. Death seems to touch everything I care about before I can reach it. I awake weak with exhaustion from my restless slumber. Spending the day trying to reach a tolerable level of sorrow, attaining it just in time to start the cycle over again.