bad habit

When looking back on the past there is somewhat of a pattern for the way things are dealt with. Conflicts with friends that just don't seem worth the effort or hassle of remedying? Produces the thought that there are plenty of other people to be friends with. Conflicts with teachers? Change classes. Conflicts with roommates? Move. Death of a friend? Hide away from those things and people that bring up memories. Death of a loved one? Hide from myself in a drunken stupor. Heartbreak? Pretend I didn't care that much and show it by befriending them. I run. I hide. I never face anything. Now that this has been realized... I have to stop this terrible habit from ruining friendships, from holding me back, and from not being true to myself. I have to own my mistakes, emotions, and personal conflicts. No more hiding.